Single on Valentines Day

As Valentines Day season ramps up once again, it is natural for single people to feel hyper-aware of the absence of a valentine. However, Valentines Day does not have to be sad. This year, why not be your own valentine? Instead of directing your efforts towards another person, focus positive energy towards doing healthy activities that YOU enjoy. Make the day a celebration of self-love. While the romantic fan fare of the holiday makes it look like single people are missing out, often that is not the case. In reality, valentines day is actually a huge obligation that for many couples, leads to disappointment. The New York times describes valentines day as an “expectant holiday” and reports a spike in break ups each year around this time. This is because the holiday creates pressure to expect a romantic extravaganza which is usually not realistic and causes stress for both parties in the relationship. This is especially true for people who are in low-income situations. The holiday imposes the need for each person to prove love for the other. If one does not participate, the other is let down, the situation becomes stressful and disappointing.

The good news is, as a single person, you have no obligation to do anything laborious or costly unless you want to do something of that sort for yourself. In other words, you are entirely independent and free to do anything that you want with your day. This is a great attribute that many single people take for granted. So what are you going to do with your day? Perhaps you have the whole day free (which is likely as Valentines Day is on a Saturday this year), and perhaps all your friends already have plans for Valentines Day; what is there to do?
Here are some ideas:
  • Go see a movie in the theater. It is fun to go to the movies alone. If you have never tried it now is a great time! Choose a film that looks good (preferably not a romantic comedy), buy snacks, choose a good seat and get lost in the cinema.
  • Run or walk a Valentines Day 5k. There are several in Seattle that are designed to be fun and non-competitive. For example there is the Cupid5K. Benefits from this run go to a good cause, as the event seeks to raise money to end sex slavery. They even have a registration option for people who hate Valentines Day. Check it out: There is also the valentines day dash:
  • Go on a walk or a bike ride. Consider a scenic destination such as a local park or a paved trail such as the Interurban trail or the Burke-Gilman trail.
  • Do a project around the house. Clean, re-organize, or paint a room perhaps. This can easily be an all day event and you will feel accomplished once it's finished.
  • Perhaps you would rather veg-out. That's fine! Consider renting a movie, buying a special treat and just relaxing.
  • Pick up a hobby. Is there something you really enjoy that you haven't done for a while? Now is a great time for that! Perhaps read, sew, do a craft, do a puzzle, or make a vision board.
  • Why not have a spa-day at the house? Light candles and listen to relaxing music while soaking your feet, or taking a bath. Look online for easy home recipes for face masks, body-butters and other fun products to pamper yourself with.

Really, this is just another day. If you find yourself feeling down, remember that you are not alone. Many others get the blues around this time of year as well. Remember that feelings come and go. Use this day as a reminder to love yourself well!